You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
so i just realized i am an alcoholic. I was making some tomato soup because im still sick, and put vodka in it. sad huh? lets go out!
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
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