I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
Apparently oprah and I were in competition to see who's ass could get bigger this summer
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
normally i would apologize for my drunk texting but even sober me agrees.
MASS TEXT: who ever dared Todd to suck on the Clorox wipes last night.. good goin jackass. you can come visit him, hes in room 266, AFTER hes done getting his stomach pumped.
HE DARED ME TO DARE HIM... DONT PUT THAT ON ME.
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
You won't wear your Santa suit, I can't get trashed, and you won't use handcuffs! This is the worst Christmas EVER.
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
Randomize
