Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
You were doing bacon vodka shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce. You're officially fucking disgusting. I love you.
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
Nothing says "sober up, you whore" quite like an early morning PAP smear.
Randomize
