I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
Randomize
