Is it because I queefed?
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
It's one of those days where you order the free Papa John's pizza so the delivery guy can bring you Coke to go with your rum. The tip was more than the order.
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
I'm in the city buying alcohol. I just got warned by a homeless man on the street that I shouldn't look so pretty "in these parts"
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
I have 2 voicemails from u last night. one of them is just 5 min of u saying "doodling"...
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
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