she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
Dude, can't find my socks anywhere....
Yeah, you took a shit in the harbor off a wall, used them to wipe. I'm sure they're still on the beach somewhere if you really want them back
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
Guy Shares All The ‘New Discoveries’ He’s Made Since Moving In With His Girlfriend And It’s Hilariously Relatable
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run.
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
Guy Accidentally Starts A Group Chat With All The Girls He’s Talking To And Gets Absolutely Roasted
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
Who knew sons of strippers would be really feminist boyfriends?
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
Randomize
