Well I left you a voicemail but you probably won't be able to hear it because my mic is fucked up. I think you need to come down here and take it in for me.
I hate this phone so bad I'm going to lose all of my friends because of it
Yeah...you probably will...
well, you're marked off my christmas card list for next year.
she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
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