There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
I just found out you can file for divorce online. I love America.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
Exactly how does jacking off in my purse count as a 'early christmas present'?
I just scrubbed chocolate off the bathtub... You better have had a damn good birthday
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Emergency nipple ring removal:vodka, tweezers, and vodka. Can you bring me a band-aid?
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
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