Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
I'm just saying, I walked in on you blowing a burrito. I now understand how obsessed you are with Taco Bell. And how long it's been since you've got some.
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
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