We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
Gym doesn't open till 11. I'm sure that of the other four people waiting in the lobby, I'm the only one still drunk and only going to the gym to shower.
don't worry dude, we didn't fuck on your bed out of respect for you
couldn't find a condom?
basically
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
That stripper was not happy when I tried putting a dollar in her court mandated ankle bracket/tracking device
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
Randomize
