is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
Why does Corona taste like a burp?
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
And, by “make you dinner” I mean “have lots of sex and multiple orgasms.” So you should probably eat something and before you come over
And hydrate too
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
Randomize
