I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
Somedays I wish I were a bird. Then people wouldn't be so grossed out when I vomit
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
i just had to use the keg as a stool to reach the margarita maker. i'm such a problem solver.
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
Today I made my parents proud-spent the afternoon floating around in their pool drinking beer-which I would ask my nephews to get for me out of the fridge
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
Randomize
