At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup?
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
Pounded a bottle of Moscato in my underwear while watching Pretty Little Liars...am I really gonna be 30 next year?
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
Randomize
