i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
I just rubbed my dick on something in your apartment. Can you guess what?
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
I'm sorry but I require more work than your hamster. I need food, a minimum of 5 pillows, and I need to be played with daily.
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
Remember when you walked in on me sleeping INSIDE a pillowcase?
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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