he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
My tally is now official: I have been drunk every weekend since 2008. Cheers.
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
I woke up and watched my kitten suck on his nipple. Way too hungover to intervene. He thought it was me, so he just giggled and mumbled "mmm girl."
Seriously? God I hope he wasn't lactating.
......... Poor kitty
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
I'm definitely drunk. At the gyno. On my birthday. Life is a joooooooke
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