You're a big dope. Life is about fighting for what you want, not accepting what you hate.
Why does tequilla always make you text me?
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
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So I had a crappy evening so the fat girl in me says eat and cry and watch something sad. The cool girl in me says don't eat go run. So I'm watching family guy and doing crunches w a pickle in my mouth
Gross
AN ACTUAL PICKLE
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
Cleaning my room at 2am, in just one corner I found six beers, half a pint of whiskey, my flask, 2 shotgun bullets, my crown and shimmer lotion.
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
How many of my Tinder dates can my Christian roommate accidentally meet in the hallway at 3am before she's horrified and moves out?
Looks like I accidentally stole two of your beers and left my pants at your place.
How did you leave without pants?
So glad I can hide money in my wallet and drunk me is too stupid to find it. Hangover sushi ftw.
I feel kind of like we’re in a gang and tonight is one of those “people are gonna know not to fuck with us” type of nights. And then tomorrow I am going to learn to pole dance. I’m not really sure how I got to this point in my life… but I like it.
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
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