She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
i'm 85% sure that if you don't visit me i will do something awkward and potentially dangerous to you in your sleep involving chocolate milk and a sham-wow.
i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
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