What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
Come see our sink grown plant.
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
We told you to stay put for 2 minutes. We come back out and your being handcuffed yelling "DO YOU FEEL LIKE A GOOD FUCKING PERSON ARRESTING ME ON MY BIRTHDAY?!"
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
He literally shoved the EMT, climbed in the back of the ambulance with his vodka and was like, "C'mon, people. Wrap this up. I got shit to do."
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
Randomize
