i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
It's like a parade of train wrecks.
Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
i just woke up in my dog's bed, on my parents floor, my outfit on backwards, and a bottle of lube poured down my pocket.
Randomize
