so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
Someday soon you'll wake up next to a bottle of jameson and a half eaten lean cuisine and then you'll be just like me.
I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
I mean I feel like if you explain to the emoji app company that your friend got plastered and fell to the ground and is trying to scheme her way back to normal life and get her dignity back they would understand just how necessary it is to have a fingers crossed emoji...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
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