He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
Thanks for not stopping me when I decided to call my mom at 2 in the morning to ask her where I was born
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
Me saying I wish i was a better person + me pretending I don't want to fuck on my period = me lying
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
Are these your boobs on my camera?
How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
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