Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
You promised me a handle of vodka if I took home her ugly friend. Thanks to law class I took for the 2nd time I know that's a unilateral contract asshole
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
I keep finding granola in my bed. This is what I get for sleeping with a guy from Oregon.
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
Randomize