Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
I awoke this morning to a naked boyfriend flying a remote controlled shark around his apartment. This is my life.
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
Randomize
