he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing says happy baby shower like showing up still kinda drunk from last night with an open tall boy in one hand and fries in the other.
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thanks for walking over, a conversation about David Bowie's dick as a muppet is exactly what my day was missing.
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
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