My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
17 Women That Lost Condoms Up Their Lady Parts
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
I love how our sober spotter means you only have to stay sober enough to type your pin in an ATM
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
23 People Confess The Most F*cked Up Thing Guests Have Done In Their House
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.