i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did you wake up with "jello shots" stamped on your hand too?
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
why didn't you tell me his penis tasted like oreos?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.
Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
p.s i need to stop drunk texting my mom. she brings up text convos all the time and i have no idea what shes talking about...
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
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