I'm at some bar in brklyn... just made out with a guy named Owen.
He is a pre-school teacher... just sang me a song about weather.
At a straight bar and poker face just came on...must...resist....urge to gay it up
Why would that come on at a straight bar? I thought they just played Don't Stop Believin and Wonderwall on repeat
In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
I just thought I should tell you that I always know what you are doing. Everywhere. Every time. -Your loving Mother
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