This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
Remember that time a drunk Dracula took a shit in the urinal? Ooh, that's right, it was last night.
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
Randomize
