drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
Apparently, the Mormons have taken over airports. I was told by a befuddled looking clerk I couldn't buy a beer with breakfast before 6am.
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
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