this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
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