Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
i would totally switch to progressive if they'd let me bang that girl in the commercial.
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
Sunburned by dick at the nude beach. Bad. She tried to blow me. But. I. Just. Can't. Saddest day of my life.
Randomize
