Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
During sex she told me I could do anything I wanted to her. You remember that toy lightsaber we bought at Wal Mart?
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
He is currently in a meeting and I am sexting him in Italian
And he's using Google translate to reply. Who says cross country relationships can't be fun?
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
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