my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
"He's not as cute as he was last week" and "I'm not as drunk as I was last week" are basically the same sentence.
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