I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
I pulled down his boxers and a 20 dollar bill fell out. I'm telling you, the blowjob fairy EXISTS
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
I wanted him to come me this time. So I told him last time I was in the city I hit a lady on the head with an inflatable Santa Claus and just found out that the restraining order she requested against me was granted. We never hung out.
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
Randomize
