They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
When cunnilingus is one of the first 25 words you say to someone there's a problem
#reasonsyoushouldnthaveatinder
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
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