I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
You got pulled on stage by a stripper who wore ruffled ankle socks and did jumping jacks for her dance. Then you were put in a chokehold by a security guard that almost cried because you supposedly said "fuck you!" to him.
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
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