you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
Waitress cut us off at Chili's bar. New low
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
I woke up to my dog trying to clean my vagina.
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
Oh my god I peed in a park last night and then tried to set off fireworks with a group of middle-aged men
Did you hear about Miss Teen Delaware? From the snippet they played on the radio, I knew exactly what porn company it was from. Maybe I should cut back
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
I had to say goodbye to one of my fuck buddies last night. He's voting for Trump, we shouldn't be doing it anyways.
He drove me to my therapist appointment because I was too drunk to drive. Total keeper.
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
Randomize
