it was almost as awkward as hearing my parents on friday nights in 2 in the morning starting, and than hearing at 2:01 my dad getting up and my mom going "i should have married a man"
I hate myself for saying your mom and I have the same friday nights.
don't worry... so do I
The sex was great until she started shouting, "Succeed!, Succeed!" Then it was like I was fucking a motivational speaker. Awkward.
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
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as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
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just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
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