you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
Things I had in my bed when I woke up: an avocado, a toilet brush, and a note that says thanks but no thanks with the number of taco bell on it. WHAT DID I DRINK?
Dude, you punched me in the face bc I wasnt ordering your tbell fast enough. Then when you got it, you threw it out the window bc, and I quote, "OBAMACAREEEE!"
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
I'm shaved like a Brazilian hooker right now.
I have the flu.
I don't give a shit
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
I’m really upset they canceled the conference. Since the divorce I’ve been working out, I bought cute new outfits and even found a bikini I liked. Now it’s all online. You can’t get laid at a webinar
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