You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
Sorry for my penis texting you last night, I can't control what he wants at 4am.
She just broke down showed up grabbed a beer said fuck it pulled off her fake eyelashes looked at my roommate and said we need to break up you're a nice guy and I'm a whore
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
Why is there bacon in the couch?
After we won that round of beer pong you attempted to swallow the winning ball whole claiming you had the mouth and jaw of a snake.
A snake? I must've been gone...
After that you got naked and hissed at people the rest of the night..
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
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