we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
It's like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
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