he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
Remember back in the day when getting fingered in the movie theater was the best thing ever?
Considering that my ex-wife dumped me to become a lesbian, the Universe owes me a threesome.
apparently people get pissed when you take the bag of wine out of the franzia box and put it in your purse before leaving the party
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
I went in the hotel's jacuzzi fully clothed, threw up in the bathroom half an hour later and woke up naked next to Dr. Seuss' "Oh the Places You'll Go"
Randomize
