Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
There's a mouse. In the house. By the cans. With some pans. Release the cat. To eat his hat. Sorry about the mess. Of my breakfest.
No but seriously, there's a fucking mouse in the house by the beer cans
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
I began mixing captain Morgan and jack daniels and called it captain jack sparrow. I puked. a lot.
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
Also I'm eating leftovers with a pair of bullet removal forceps (unused) because I don't have a fork.
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
Randomize
