how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
I just threw up while getting a haircut. I'm never trying to accomplish stuff with a hangover again.
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
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Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
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btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
I had a drinkin contest with a person that didnt exsist, fuck withdrawl day
Hold on are you sure that we dont have another roommate?
Yes.
You know something is wrong with your life when your mom is at the bar getting free tequila shots and you aren't
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
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