i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
I don't care how drunk you were. Sending me a pic of your dick dressed as Uncle Sam with the caption "I want you" isn't an acceptable pick up line.
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
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