But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
On Saturday, I sharted on my roommates dog while trying to make it smell my farts. Today I got security clearance to work for one of the most respected and secretive govt agencies in the US
It's the American dream
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
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me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
I'm not drunk enough to eat silly string
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
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after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
You know your life has gone off the rails when waking up in a Spanish hospital with alcohol poisoning and no memory of how you got there is not even your top wildest drinking story.
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