Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
Currently behind the bar at some asian place, pouring drinks for everyone with a snake around my neck
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
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