every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
I'm at Lowes and I'm constantly looking for things to vomit in, just in case
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
Hungover in church. I can feel stained glass Jesus judging me.
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
Here's a rundown of my night alone. Danced my ass off in the kitchen to FleetmacWood. Drank a little bit. Ordered $40 worth of Chinese food once the drinks kicked in. Picked up said Chinese in dirty sweatpants and slippers. #livinglife
Randomize