How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
My phone just autocorrected 'vagina' to 'vaginihilation'...when exactly did I need to convey total annihilation by lady parts??
You should have heard my farts after he left. I swear one of them was a demonic voice saying, "It's coming for you, Nicole. It's coming,".
I'm sorry I came to your house drunk and fed pizza to your dog.
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
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