We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
I just mistook a monk for someone with the newest colored snuggie.
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
I mean how do you tell a nurse in the ER that you dislocated your knee giving a blowjob to your boyfriend.
Very innocently.
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
Gonna be hard to top last New Year's Eve when the guy I blew came at midnight
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
Randomize
