Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
To my ex and my favorite mistake: I totally enjoyed hearing you have erectile disfunction via baby monitor!
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
The girl who comes up after me always strips to Lana Del Rey. I didn't think working in a strip club could be any more depressing.
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
Btw I definitely had pizza sauce on my face, a painful hickey on my neck, and I just remember screaming SISTER WIVES because of the girl's 1997 jean skirt! Wow.
Randomize
