so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
I wish the ER had shaved that part of my head. It would be easier to show people my staples at the bar.
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
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